I’ll never forget Marie’s words. I am never alone. She spoke in French, her mother tongue, with a reassuring tone. We were sitting in her living room at the time, and though the words came out of nowhere, I knew exactly what she meant. I knew immediately because of what we share. Marie is my first cousin once removed—my father’s first cousin. She’s ninety-four years of age. I first visited her when I was sixteen. It was my first solo trip abroad. Back then, she lived in Basel, and I would sit in her presence for hours. In her kitchen, I learnt how to make salad sauces and helped her prepare the evening meal. I never felt in the way; she always made room for me. On this past visit, in June 2023, I felt just as welcome. Her home is a place of warmth, order, and love. The view from her balcony is breathtaking and so beautiful. I am never alone. These words are so precious to both of us now. In 1983, unknown to each other, we both began to follow Jesus. I was twenty-three and she was fifty-five. Of course, it radically changed our conversations. From then on, we grew much closer, learning and growing together in our faith. She lived in a different country, but we wrote to each other and spoke on the phone. She was, and is, truly a gift of God to me. Marie has not had an easy life. Her husband, who’s now passed away, did love her, but he was also emotionally abusive most of their married life. Indeed, he was so brusque and unpleasant at times that due to his behaviour, she lost several friends. Not only that, but one of her sons is estranged from the family to this day because of the way his father treated him. I also felt this man’s harsh tones. Once, he even asked me why I bothered coming to visit. He probably expected me to abandon Marie as others had. I told him that I loved my cousin, though I don’t think he understood what I meant. Through it all, however, Marie never lost hope. She believed that in spite of the many difficulties she faced, God had given her husband to her for a purpose. As he declined in his later years, she displayed immense patience and love, nursing him right up to his death at the age of eighty. That was eighteen years ago. I am never alone. These words were especially important to her in moments of profound grief. Her grandson fell to his death on a hike. He was just sixteen. As she grieved, she still opened her heart and her home to me, inviting me in and displaying the same extraordinary hospitality that I had always received. I am never alone. Where did this conviction come from? I believe it grew. I believe she made room for it to grow. And I believe it grew from a habit known as ‘practicing the presence of God.’ Each day, she rose early and completed her chores. Then she made breakfast and by 9.30am, everything was put away, her husband had left for work, and she was alone. That’s when she disappeared into her craft room for between thirty minutes to an hour. This was her ‘alone time’. This was her chance to spend time with her Lord, listening to him, reading his Word, and praying. Without this time, I’m not sure she could have survived her marriage. It was essential to her wellbeing. It gave her inner strength and resilience. Her story reminds me of another—the movie, War Room, released in 2015. The main character also has a prayer room and like Marie, comes to faith later in life. Her prayer room is her ‘war room’, the location where she pours out her heart to God, doing battle in the spiritual realm, and trusting her Saviour to answer her prayers. I wonder if you have a ‘war room,’ a place where you come to spend time each day with your Saviour. Recently, I’ve been impacted by the teaching of Brother Lawrence and Frank Laubach, two men who wrote about the spiritual life—especially as it relates to our daily dependence on God. Here’s Brother Lawrence. The difficulties of life do not have to be unbearable. It is the way we look at them - through faith or unbelief - that makes them seem so. We must be convinced that our Father is full of love for us and that He only permits trials to come our way for our own good. Let us occupy ourselves entirely in knowing God. The more we know Him, the more we will desire to know Him. As love increases with knowledge, the more we know God, the more we will truly love Him. We will learn to love Him equally in times of distress or in times of great joy. The Practice of the Presence of God, Brother Lawrence On a similar theme, Frank Laubach wrote these words in 1930. Oh, this thing of keeping in constant touch with God, making Him the object of my thought and the companion of my conversations, is the most amazing thing I ever ran across. It is working. I cannot do it even half a day — not yet, but I believe I shall be doing it some day for the entire day. It is a matter of acquiring a new habit of thought. Now I like God’s presence so much that when for a half hour or so He slips out of mind — as He does many times a day, I feel as though I had deserted Him, and as though I had lost something very precious in my life. The writer of Hebrews addresses our daily dependence on God by linking the key to endurance with the practice of keeping our eyes on Jesus. Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. Heb 12.1-2a I am never alone. A life in ministry can be lonely at times. Leaders sometimes feel isolated from those they lead. They need support and encouragement. Living Leadership can help, but so too can the habit of practicing the presence of God. For you are never, ever alone. A verse from the prophet Isaiah has been of immense comfort to Marie. I pray that as you read, you too are comforted by it. So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isa 41.10 Even in the depths of loneliness and struggle, Marie held onto her Saviour and the truth of this verse. For her God did strengthen her, did help her, and continues to do so. She is ninety-four, and close to the day when she will meet her Saviour face to face. Yet still she clings to him. Even after all these years. For she knows her God is faithful and true. He upholds her with his righteous right hand. May he do the same for you. Each and every day.

A few months ago, I began a series of posts based on the movie, McFarland, USA*. Here is the fourth post in this series. (Read my first post, including synopsis. My second post. My third post.) Where do you see Jesus in this world? If you pay attention, you’ll see him everywhere. His glory is displayed in the sunrise, his mercy exhibited in every food bank, his grace unfolding through acts of forgiveness around the world. Hardly surprising, then, that we see him in the stories we tell. Enter Jim White from the movie, McFarland, USA. The movie is based on a true story. Jim White (his actual name) is a real person, whose extraordinary life we follow on screen. It’s a story which highlights the immense impact he had on a bunch of Latino teenagers in a poor town in California’s Central Valley. As I watched the movie and reflected on it, I couldn’t help seeing parallels with the life of Jesus. I need to make clear, however, that I’m not saying that Jim White is exactly like Jesus. He isn’t. Indeed, some of his frailty contrasts strongly with the example we see in the life of Christ. Nevertheless . . . INCARNATION Let’s begin with the word ‘incarnation’. Christ took on human flesh in order to share his life with us. He joined us bodily in order to be with us, listen to us, care for us, teach us, and ultimately die for us (Heb 2.14-17). When Jim White first arrived in McFarland, he came among a people very different to himself. He didn’t speak the language, he didn’t know the customs, and in fact, his initial attitude contrasts strongly with Jesus. He took the job in McFarland unwillingly, and expressed a desire to leave as soon as possible. Yet he made the sacrifice. He moved to a small town in the middle of nowhere for one reason: to take care of his family. He did it out of love. The Incarnation—capital I—is far more remarkable than we have hearts and minds to imagine. Jim White was still in the USA, the nation of his birth. Although most used Spanish, they also spoke English. By contrast, Christ left a home completely unlike ours. Heaven is a place where the will of the Father is enacted perfectly. There is no suffering, no injustice, no evil, no blemish of any kind. Yet at Christmas—just a few weeks ago—we celebrate the day when our Lord entered our damaged, sinful, unjust, broken, violent world. Earth, though beautiful in so many ways, is not a place fit for a heavenly king. It is not pure and holy, but stained and bloodied by violence and sin. This is the world that our perfect Lord entered—Roman violence, corrupt religious leaders, greedy tax collectors, to name just a few examples of human depravity. Just like today. How remarkable, then, that the Lord Jesus chose, of his own free will, to join us down here in the dirt. He did it out of love. UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL What will you do to get to know your church community? Jim White could have stood aloof, teaching at school and running his practices before going home to his family. Service yes, but not sacrifice. Instead, he enters the homes of the boys he’s leading. He eats with them, surrounded by a language he doesn’t understand. Later, he spends a day in the fields picking cabbages. It’s back-breaking work, and he’s soon massaging his aching muscles. He buys the whole team shoes, rubs shoulders with all the local businessmen, and though it’s a struggle, he eventually manages to murmur a few words in Spanish. More than that, he embraces the customs of his community, holding a quinceanera* for his daughter. In short, he does everything he can—within the limits of his humanity—to enter a foreign land, a way of living with which he is not familiar. He does this, in part, because he needs the collaboration of the parents to run his practices. There is something in it for him. But he also does it because he cares deeply for the boys. They are not just students to him. They become like sons, and he will do whatever is necessary to inspire and lead them. Including eating more enchiladas than is healthy! What about Jesus? He joined us at our table (Zacchaeus), he went to work with us (Simon Peter), he taught us (Matt 5-7), became weary and wept with us (John’s gospel). He drew near. In Jim White, we see a man prepared to enter a world he didn’t know or understand. In Jesus we see a far greater sacrifice—our God becoming man to rub shoulders with the dirty, the rebellious, the idol-worshipers. And he did it for love. OPPOSITION It should be written into a minister’s job description. Will face frequent opposition. Must put up with people who argue, complain, and refuse to cooperate. We see it too in the life of Jim White. His ‘disciples’ drag their feet. They often complain. They lack belief in the goal. His most talented runner, Thomas Valles, walks out. The team almost falls apart. Jim also faces opposition from the boys’ parents. One father withdraws all three of his sons, saying that their practices are getting in the way of their work in the fields. At school, Jim faces criticism from a teacher, who scolds him for not being willing enough to help with after-school activities. He also gets into trouble with his family for forgetting his daughter’s birthday. At times, it seems like the whole world is against him. And so to the Lord Jesus. It seems like the whole world is against him. Where to start? His parents chased out of the country, running for their lives. A confrontation with the devil before his ministry begins; his own family who disown him; followers who leave him when the going gets tough (John 6.66). And I haven’t even started with the Pharisees and the Romans. The life of Jesus is one huge struggle. Because love is costly. It is painted in blood, sweat, and tears. For not only did Christ die on the cross, but he ‘died’ each day as he showed us what it looks like to ‘overcome the world’ (John 16.33b). For contrary to certain ways of thinking nowadays, the world isn’t one big happy family that just seems to have lost its way a bit. The world is in active rebellion against its creator. Jesus described us as ‘evil’, and for good reason. Light vs. dark. Good vs. evil. God vs. the devil. A fight. Hence, opposition. Which brings us to one of the most important dualities. Life and death. LIFE AND DEATH The Messiah came to die. He came to launch the kingdom of the heavens, and then he came to die to demonstrate his triumph over sin, death, and the devil. He came to save us. What do we see in the life of Jim White? We see a man who saves. Quite literally. In one scene, he finds one of his students sitting on a bridge over a busy road. Traffic roars along underneath. The young man is preparing to jump. Until his new teacher comes along and talks him down. But this isn’t the most important moment in the movie. That comes right at the end. Like Jesus, Jim White faces temptation. He is tempted to leave McFarland and take up the kind of job he has wanted his whole adult life—well-paid, with a comfortable home in a largely middle-class majority white town called Palo Alto. He is sorely tempted. Until the very final scene. After winning the state championship, he breathes out his decision. “McFarland.” He decides to stay in the town which has become his home. Poor. Working class. Majority Latino. Jim White lives in McFarland to this day. He recently celebrated his 59th wedding anniversary there. I see this as a demonstration of the ultimate sacrifice. Because many can give. But true sacrifice requires an entire life. To give up everything for the sake of love, one must pay with one’s life. For Christ was born with his death already laid out before him. He came to die for us, to offer up his life for us. Let us give thanks for an act of love that has no rival. Let us give thanks for the ultimate sacrifice . . . that gives us life. *A quinceanera is a celebration in the Latino community in the USA when a young woman turns fifteen.

The Flourishing Pastor: Recovering the Lost Art of Shepherd Leadership, Tom Nelson, IVP Praxis, 2021, 246 pages, ISBN: 978-151400132-5, List price: £14.99 “An impoverished theological vision, inadequate spiritual formation, and faulty pastoral praxis” (p.6). That is how Tom Nelson describes his younger self as he emerged from his time in seminary to start into ministry as a church planter. His reflections on his ministry experience and his observation that “the pastoral vocation is increasingly at risk” (p.7) in the contemporary setting, along with his conviction that “the One who calls pastors will provide the wisdom, guidance, strength, and empowerment to flourish and finish well” (p.7) led him to write The Flourishing Pastor. Inspired by the description of David’s shepherd leadership in Psalm 78 verse 72, he sets out to explore what it is to be a shepherd (Part 1), to have integrity of heart (Part 2) and to serve in pastoral ministry with skilful hands (Part 3). The result is an excellent guide to shepherding ministry that deserves a careful read by anyone called to pastor. Nelson is concerned that the pastoral calling is in crisis because many are tempted to one of three “perilous paths”: the celebrity pastor, the visionary pastor, or the lone ranger pastor (Chapter 1). He seeks to call pastors back to an understanding of the pastoral calling that is rooted in faith in God and happy to embrace obscurity (Chapter 2) and flows from an understanding of oneself as a sheep in the care of the Good Shepherd (Chapter 3). Having laid these foundations in his first section, Nelson proceeds to explore what integrity of heart means in terms of an integral life (Chapter 4) in apprenticeship to Jesus who calls us to be yoked to him (Chapter 5) and pursuing wholeness through healthy life practices (Chapter 6). The final section of the book considers skills for ministry, which Nelson understands as being about equipping God’s people to be a faithful presence in the world (Chapter 7). He argues that that goal means we must cultivate a flourishing culture in our churches (Chapter 8), help people connect Sunday to Monday (Chapter 9) and measure ministry progress by how well we are doing this (Chapter 10). He closes with a challenge to finish well (Chapter 11) based in a reminder of how often biblical leaders ended poorly and in the words of Paul to Timothy. The Flourishing Pastor contains a wealth of wisdom for pastoral ministry. Its call to obscurity and integrity is deeply challenging and thoroughly biblical. Nelson’s reflections on Jesus’ call to take his yoke, a passage many readers will know well, are refreshing and enlightening. His concerns about misunderstandings of pastoral ministry are timely and his central assertion that pastors need to recover an understanding of what it is to shepherd God’s people under Christ is surely crucial. Personally, I appreciated his frequent references to authors I have found helpful, especially Dietrich Bonhoeffer and Henri Nouwen. The inclusion of a Discussion Guide, with questions helping readers to reflect upon each chapter, relate it to their own experience and apply it to their future practice, makes The Flourishing Pastor a valuable tool for use in leadership teams or one-to-one mentoring relationships. It feels like Tom Nelson really speaks the language of Living Leadership. Or almost! At times his writing felt unnecessarily complex, with many technical terms he assumes the reader will understood, and his occasional references to neurobiology are unhelpfully brief and add little to his case. Personally, I must also confess that I am not a fan of the word ‘flourishing’, which appears quite often in the book as well as in the title. Like another recurrent phrase in this book, “the common good”, I fear it is too open to misunderstanding. Whilst his vision for pastoral ministry as equipping God’s people to serve him in all of life, he does not explain how to navigate the differences in understanding of what is ‘good’ that are bound to arise between Christians and others in today’s culture. This presumably looks different in his context in the USA from Europe and will need some careful contextualisation. In general, Part 3 of The Flourishing Pastor is less well-developed than the first two parts. It labours the point of equipping for whole-life discipleship without exploring other skills a shepherd pastor needs, such as feeding people from God’s word, praying for them, and tending to their wounds. Readers will need to look elsewhere for help in Word ministry, prayer and pastoral care. The great strength of this valuable book is in its attention to the pastor’s calling and heart. It is more than worth the cover price for its excellent and challenging thoughts on these subjects. Its consideration of the pastor’s task is less complete, but still worth a reflective read. The Flourishing Pastor speaks to the heart and will fan the flame in readers of a passion to shepherd others “with integrity of heart” and “skilful hands” (Psalm 78:72).

The clock strikes midnight on New Year’s Eve. Fireworks light up the skies. Bang! Pop! After an off-key rendering of Auld Lang Syne, you hear the same few sentiments that seem to come each year. ‘Happy New Year!’ ‘Glad this year is behind us!’ ‘A fresh start!’ ‘I hope this coming year is a good one!’ For those of us who have been experiencing a difficult time, the blank page of a new year can hold out so much promise. Perhaps that’s you. Maybe you have been experiencing a frustrating season of ministry, navigating conflict and disunity; or your family has been going through hardship or suffering. Or perhaps, more simply, it has been a relentless Christmas period and you are just hoping for a restful January when it’s all over. It is easy to put our hopes for rest, refreshment and, ultimately, joy in the prospect of the weeks and months to come. A blank calendar of endless possibility, underpinned by the world’s insidious idea that ‘new is always better’ and ‘the grass is always greener on the other side’. As leaders, we know this isn’t where our hope should hang, but in day-to-day terms, it is easy for our hearts to long for these things to be the answer to our struggles. As I reflected on this in my own life recently, a familiar line from a traditional carol took on new weight. The hopes and fears of all the years are met in thee tonight. O Little Town of Bethlehem HOPES AND FEARS . . . What are you hoping for right now? What is causing you to fear? What is occupying your waking thoughts and nightly dreams? Or as a doctor might ask, ‘Tell me, where does it hurt right now?’ The end of the year is often a time when we take stock, but all that ‘stock-taking’ can have a dangerous by-product. It can lead to us looking too long at our world and our circumstances. As we take inventory of our life and the lives of those we lead, we can easily become overwhelmed by the stains of sin and the fall. Worse still, we may find ourselves drawing comparisons with others. If we’re not careful, our vision can become full of either . . . 1) The things we don’t see—the places of disappointment and perceived lack. All the things we wish we could change. OR 2) The approaching change we are anticipating, which may be making us feel anxious. (I have stood on the cusp of more than one year, thinking, ‘This is going to be hard; I wish I could stop time and stay where I am’.) . . . OF ALL THE YEARS . . . When our eyes are on this world, all we can see is change—the change we long for and the change we don’t want. Placing our hopes on the changing of a year is a lot like standing on shifting sands and trying to find firm footing. But when we lift our eyes to our Lord, we see what is unchanging and we find the stability and sure-footedness we are seeking. Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and for ever. Heb 13.8 As a well-known song so famously puts it, On Christ the solid rock I stand | All other ground is sinking sand. My Hope is Built on Nothing Less Throughout history, there has never been a day when God has not been faithful to his promises. There has never been a day when God has not been at work delivering his plan of salvation for his people, for you. There has never been a moment, whether the last year has been good or bad to you, when God has not been with you. And there never will be. We know all this—it is nothing new—and yet somehow, we can so easily lose sight of it. We point others to the hope of Jesus, but in subtle ways our own hopes and fears become tied to the fickle things of this world. This happens even though we know they can never provide us with the stability and joy we desire. We need to anchor our hopes and fears in our Lord who is ‘my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.’ (Ps 18.2) Even if your whole world changes in 2024, God does not. In him you can take refuge when it all feels too much. He is your stronghold when it seems that everything is against you. He is your source of strength when you are running dry. Let us lift our eyes from our circumstances and set them firmly back on our Saviour. . . . ARE MET IN THEE TONIGHT Somewhere in that little town of Bethlehem, a baby was born. Resting on his tiny shoulders were the hopes of God’s people who had been waiting centuries for the arrival of the Messiah. For generations, they had been waiting for God to step in and make everything right. They had been eagerly expecting the day when God would bring an end to their pain, sadness, and fatigue. They may even have been people who faced the turning of each year muttering to each other, “Maybe this year!? Maybe this year salvation will come.” In that little town of Bethlehem, their hopes were met and their fears alleviated as the unchanging God entered our changeable world. For Christ came to live, die, and rise again . . . and for us, that changes everything! We cannot guarantee that the new year will be happy. Nor can we be sure that the start will be fresh, or that 2024 will be a good year. But we can make a choice about where we seek our rest, refreshment, and joy. We can hold onto our unchangeable Saviour, who holds us fast in the midst of a changing world. So do join me as I grasp tightly to him and walk into this new year.

This year, my family and I are living the Christmas story. At least, that’s how it feels. For months, we were eagerly awaiting the arrival of a baby. Then, on December 7, he arrived: Samuel Aguilera, my grandson. There was an upgrade in transportation—less donkey, more American Airlines from California. He came bearing gifts—my daughter, Rebecca, and my son-in-law, Caleb. He is seven months old now, and weighs twenty-three pounds. He’s huge! And heavy, so heavy. Along with my children, he is without doubt the most beautiful child in all of history. You think this is hyperbole? It is not. 😉 BABIES So, what is it about babies? What do they teach us? What truths do their little faces communicate as they smile up at us? JOY Let’s start with joy. Babies give us joy, pure joy. Watch any group of people gathered around a beautiful baby and see the joy, the laughter, the delight. Babies are also extremely funny. Forget Netflix or Disney Plus. With a baby in the house, you have all the entertainment you need. Sam has already worked out how to make everyone laugh. Lean back, blow raspberries and giggle. Works every time. VULNERABILITY It’s impossible to escape just how vulnerable a baby is. For years, we humans can do little for ourselves. We are completely dependent on our caregivers. And truth be told, we never lose our vulnerability. The myth of self-sufficiency is just that. It’s a myth. We are entirely dependent on our God, who sustains this universe, who is master over every aspect of our lives, whether we acknowledge him or not. SAFETY Babies have one overriding need: to feel safe and secure. Birth itself is a complete shock to their system. From the warmth and security of the womb, a baby is launched into a hostile world. All their senses are assaulted. No wonder they cry out. A baby spends the first year of life simply adjusting to the shock of living in the world. This is why they have an overwhelming desire to feel safe and protected. It’s scary out here! The need for safety never really leaves us. This is why the Bible is such a wonderful source of comfort to those who feel insecure and anxious. It comforts those who, like babies, are fearful in this threatening world. Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” Ps 91.1-2 You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance. Ps 32.7 In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety. Ps 4.8 The name of the Lord is a strong tower; The righteous runs into it and is safe. Prov 18.10 LOVE After safety, love comes a very close second. Babies need love—a lot of it—and in their first few months, that is communicated through physical touch. It’s well known nowadays that physical touch isn’t just an option, but a necessity for healthy child development. Serious damage is inflicted on children who are denied physical touch during their first year of life. Certain neural pathways in the brain never develop, and short of a miracle, will never develop unless a child is held, touched, and kissed during these early months. Studies on the effect of Romanian orphanages have confirmed this. We need love. We need it desperately. Indeed, it is humanity’s greatest need—to love and be loved. We are created for it. Love the Lord your God, and love your neighbour as yourself. By this all people will know that you are my disciples: if you have love for one another. And some of my favourites from 1 John. Beloved, let’s love one another; for love is from God, and everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God . . . God is love, and the one who remains in love remains in God, and God remains in him . . . We love, because He first loved us. 1 Jn 4.7,16,19 TRUST There is so much wisdom in the words of Jesus, when he said, ‘Allow the children to come to me, and do not forbid them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.’ Indeed, he was so adamant about this that he followed it up with, ‘Truly I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child will not enter it at all.’ Receive the kingdom of God like a child. Like a child. Like a baby. When Sam greets a new person, he almost always smiles. Why? Because every person he has ever met—aside from some scary health professionals—has smiled at him. This has ingrained a habit of trust. He expects favour and he returns favour. He demonstrates innocent faith in the benevolence of other human beings. Later, of course, he will learn that people are not always what they seem, but for now, all is well. That’s because babies bring out the best in us. Dare I say it but even terrorists care for their children. UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL And so to the Christmas story that has a baby right at the centre. She (Mary) gave birth to her firstborn son; and she wrapped him in cloths, and laid him in a manger. What is Christmas about? It’s helpful to start in the realm of cinematography. In the movies, a director has many options for how the camera captures a scene. From wide-shot to close-up, all shots fall somewhere on the spectrum. The Bible is similar. The great themes of Scripture—salvation, justification, glory, sovereignty—come across as wide-shots. Romans is a wide-shot book. So is the second half of Revelation. Even the most famous verse in the Bible, John 3.16, is a wide-shot. For God so loved the world. That’s a huge panning shot of our planet. But Christmas? A baby held tenderly by his mother. This is about intimacy. This is up close and personal. The close-up. The camera zooms in, filling the lens with the long lashes, the soft skin, the look of wonder in Mary’s eyes. This is a scene which invites us not to reflect with grand vision, but to enter into an intimate moment. Immanuel. God with us. That means you, personally. By your side. Within you. Holding you. Cherishing you. Loving you. This is Christmas. For our core identity is rendered as follows: But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God. Jn 1.12a Children of God. We are children and will always be children, forever in need of our loving heavenly father, who holds us, cares for us, waits for us, seeks us, instructs us; whose heart beats constantly for us. We are children embraced like the returning prodigal, whom the father ran out to meet. Wrapped in his arms. This is Christmas. It’s about being held tenderly by our God, reflected in the image of intimacy between mother and child. This Christmas, please don’t leap to the wide-shot of Good Friday and Easter Day. Don’t skirt over this opportunity to remind people how deeply they are cherished by their God. Easter will come and glorious it will be. But right now, we are celebrating Christmas—the close-up—when the intimate incarnation took place. When God drew near to us. When he showed us just how much he loves us. It’s a moment in time when the enduring image of mother and child provides a snapshot of our core identity: child of God. For we are safe in his arms, just as the babe was safe in the arms of Mary. Worship the Christ-child this Christmas, and simply enjoy being held and protected by your Saviour, as he was held and protected by his mother so many years ago. For he is worthy of our worship. Come let us adore him.

“Oh no, not Christmas again!” After twenty-nine ‘ministry Christmases’, I’m writing this post to try to answer the question, ‘How can we remain fresh and enthusiastic at the prospect of preparing for carol services and Christmas talks yet again?’ I think I might have found the answer in the story of an elderly woman in Luke’s gospel. Her name, you may remember, is Anna. We come across her in chapter two. We read that ‘she had lived with her husband seven years after her marriage, and then was a widow until she was eighty-four.’ Life can’t have been easy for her, living with the pain and loneliness of bereavement for most of her life. Perhaps it was poverty and childlessness that initially led her to live each day in the security of the temple, where she ‘worshipped night and day, fasting and praying.’ But what could possibly have persuaded her to persevere so faithfully for so long? Perhaps the answer lies in the details that Luke includes in verse 36. There was also a prophet, Anna, the daughter of Penuel, of the tribe of Asher. Luke 2.36 Names in Jewish life carried great significance, and these particular names seem to take on added weight as we read the story. When translated, they can be rendered as follows: There was a prophet, Grace, the daughter of Face of God, of the tribe of Happy. First, we read that Anna was a prophet—the Lord chose her to be a recipient and a conduit of his word. Second, we read that her name is Grace. It’s clear elsewhere in Scripture that those who receive and pass on the word of the Lord demonstrate grace in action. For example, the apostles ‘bore witness to the word of [God’s] grace’ (Acts 14.3). In addition, Paul commended the Ephesian elders, ‘to God and the word of his grace which is able to build you up and give you an inheritance among all those who are sanctified’ (Acts 20.32). Ultimately, of course, Jesus Christ is the Word who is ‘full of grace and truth’ (John 1.14). So now as we read this section again, we see that her life and testimony give new meaning to these names. For Anna, receiving the word of the Lord allowed her, in some sense, to see the Face of God (albeit veiled) and her obedient life had sustained her in happiness throughout her long life. Yet more is taking place. As a prophet, she was able to perceive that something very special was happening: Coming up to them [Joseph, Mary and Jesus] at that very moment, she gave thanks to God and spoke about the child to all who were looking forward to the redemption of Jerusalem. Luke 2.38 With prophetic insight, Anna sees who this 8-day-old baby is. She ‘sees’ with prophetic insight—a moment of immense significance for her. And not just for her. We’re told that she spoke to ‘all who were looking forward to the redemption of Jerusalem.’ Faithful Jews, gathered in Jerusalem, were yearning for the day when the Lord God would send his Messiah and redeem his people—much as we yearn for the day when the Lord will return to establish his new creation. And now here he is. The Redeemer. The Messiah. In Simeon’s arms. Just feet away. How amazing! Her response? To give thanks to God. May I encourage you to do the same? In the midst of the busyness and even (dare I say?) the repetitiveness of Christmas preparation, take time to stop and give thanks to God for the Lord Jesus. This is especially important for those with busy schedules. For only when we ourselves draw near to give thanks and worship can we follow in Anna’s footsteps, and do so with integrity. For we read that she ‘spoke about the child.’ That’s what leaders do at Christmas services. They speak about Jesus. This is their divine calling. I remember a story about Billy Graham who was once speaking at a Cambridge mission. The first evening he tried to impress the students with an academic sermon, but it was a flop. Afterwards, he asked John Stott for advice. Stott told him to do what he had been doing throughout his life as an evangelist—just speak simply and straightforwardly about the Lord Jesus. So that’s what he did, and many students came to faith through his words. We may not be famous. We don’t have name recognition like Billy Graham or John Stott. And our story isn’t recorded in Scripture like the prophet Anna’s. But we can speak about Jesus. We can celebrate his birth, and share the good news of love come down. And as we do so, we can pray for the Holy Spirit to take our words and touch the hearts of those whom the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ ‘chose before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight’ (Eph 1.4).

How’s your church doing? It’s the question many ministers fear. As I walked towards a conference centre a while back, I knew the question was coming. It was making me nervous. What would I say? What should I say? Options tumbled through my mind. Well, there are some encouragements, but lots of challenges and I’m really not sure I can stick at it! No, that would just result in a ‘tumble-weed’ moment—an awkward silence before someone commented on the weather or politics. What about the social media approach? Stick to the positives. The verbal equivalent of endless holiday snaps with sandy beaches and sunny skies. Or perhaps just a standard platitude. Oh, it’s fine, you know, the usual ups and downs, but God is good all the time! Before I go on, I must say this was not a Living Leadership conference! Indeed, when I joined a Pastoral Refreshment Conference as a pastor, I found encouragement to look to Jesus and space to reflect and enjoy his goodness. People weren’t scrutinising my ‘ministry’, they were supporting me. But the question remains. How should leaders speak about the churches and organisations they lead? What if the first things that come to mind are problems, weaknesses, conflict? The apostle Paul sets an example for us in the way he spoke about the church in Corinth. And besides our own comfort, we rejoiced still more at the joy of Titus, because his spirit has been refreshed by you all. For whatever boasts I made to him about you, I was not put to shame. But just as everything we said to you was true, so also our boasting before Titus has proved true. And his affection for you is even greater, as he remembers the obedience of you all, how you received him with fear and trembling. I rejoice, because I have perfect confidence in you. 2 Cor 7.13-16 Paul boasted about them to Titus and expressed his confidence in them. Could you say that about the people you lead? ‘Boast’ (in Greek, kauchaomai) is a favourite word of Paul’s, especially in his second letter to the Corinthians [1]. It usually refers to his confidence in God’s work and purposes (Rom 5.2,3,11; 2 Cor 10.17) in contrast to placing confidence in ourselves (1 Cor 1.29,31; 3.21; 4.7; 5.12) or adherence to the law (Rom 2.17,23). It also describes his confidence in the authority Christ had given him as an apostle (2 Cor 10.8,13,15) and his unashamed confession of his weakness (2 Cor 11.30; 12.1,5,6,9). These statements contrast with the false boasting of the ‘super-apostles’ (2 Cor 11.12,16,18). Paul was determined not to boast in anything except Christ’s cross (Gal 6.13-14). Salvation by grace through faith precludes boasting in our strengths and efforts (Eph 2.9). This is the word—boast (in Greek, kauchaomai)—that Paul uses to describe things on which we can depend. They are things which give us confidence: God, Christ, the cross, the apostles of Christ. So, how could he use it of a church? He’s used it before. About the church in Thessalonica. He spread the word of how the Thessalonians had shown themselves steadfast amidst afflictions (2 Thess 1.4). It’s not hard to see why that church would be Paul’s ‘poster church.’ It was the standout church in his mission reports. But the church in Corinth? Really? Had he forgotten the catalogue of problems that he addressed in his first letter (1 Cor)? Factions; sexual immorality; lawsuits between members; dabbling in pagan religious practices; turning the Lord’s Supper into a self-indulgent feast; the misuse of spiritual gifts for personal satisfaction, and arguably the worst of them all: denying the resurrection of the body. If there was any New Testament church an apostle might have been tempted to gloss over, it was this one. But he doesn’t. He boasts to Titus about them and he tells them he has confidence in them. Wow. What is going on? The first thing to notice is that this was not the kind of boasting that goes on in leaders’ conferences, mission reports, or church websites. Paul was not pretending that this church was the latest, greatest thing. His confidence was in their readiness to obey the command he had given them. A command to do what was morally right and consistent with the gospel. Having said that, Paul was not at all certain how the Corinthians would act when he boasted about them to Titus. He seems relieved that they had not let him down. His confidence may have been complete when he wrote 2 Corinthians, but it really wasn’t when he sent Titus their way. So, how could he boast about this motley crew? This, I believe, is Paul living by the principle he taught them. We walk by faith, not by sight. 2 Cor 5.7 Paul was not blind to the problems in the church in Corinth. He wasn’t at all certain they would stay loyal to him. He feared they might turn against him and grieve Titus. But his hope was resolutely in God and his power (2 Cor 1.10). For this reason, his hope for the Corinthians to come good was unshaken (2 Cor 1.7). Paul was looking past the short-term challenges to the long game. It was too soon to give up on them. The final analysis of that church and their relationship with him would only come when Christ returned. So he writes . . . I hope you will fully acknowledge— just as you did partially acknowledge us—that on the day of our Lord Jesus you will boast of us as we will boast of you. 2 Cor 1.13-14 What about you? Think about the people you lead. You know their problems, their weaknesses, and their limitations. But can’t you also see their resources, strengths and possibilities? And, more importantly, don’t you know their Lord and his power? Your hope is in the God who raises the dead. He raises the dead! This is why you can be certain that your church or organisation is never beyond hope. There are no ‘Do Not Resuscitate’ orders in the kingdom of God. Of course, there’s no guarantee that your church or organisation has a future, either. Even if you lead with sincerity and integrity, as Paul did in Corinth, they may reject you. They may refuse to let you work with them for their joy (2 Cor 1.23). Sometimes the right thing to do—or the only thing you can do—is leave. However, as long as you are there, never stop trusting (and hoping) in what God can do among his people. They are his, not yours. Have confidence in them, not because of who they are (and certainly not because of who you are) but because you have cast iron confidence in the God who is at work in them. Look beyond the present to what God will do when he perfects his people. Exhibit both faith and hope. When the leaders lose hope, others do too. So, keep your expectations realistic, but set your hopes high, for their horizon is glory. The key to godly boasting doesn’t lie in believing our own propaganda or overlooking the flaws in those we lead. It isn’t found in honing our skills or improving our strategies, either. Although neither is a bad thing. It is found in our confidence in God. Boasting in the cross of Christ alone does not mean we cannot take pride in people. Indeed, if we see people as the precious inheritance for whom Christ died, greatly loved by God, and destined for glory, we have ample reason to take pride in them. And we may even learn to love them better. For our boasting is founded upon our God, whose love and faithfulness are everlasting. So how’s your church? I won’t mind if you boast a little . . . [1] Of 37 New Testament appearances of kauchaomai, 35 are in Paul’s letters (the other two are in James), and 20 of those are in 2 Corinthians

The soup is simmering on the stove, filling the kitchen with hearty smells of autumn. The table is laid with brownies, cheeses, and chutneys. I want this lunch to be special. I want each guest to feel honoured. To know how much they are loved, how valuable they are. As I scan the room for last-minute tweaks, my heart is full of thankfulness. This isn’t just any Friday lunch with friends. This lunch is a testimony to God’s gracious provision and kindness. There will be joy and laughter around this table, but the joy will be tinged with sorrow. For one seat will be left empty. That seat belonged to the person who prayed this group into being. It belonged to Jos. Over the last few years, our women’s Friday nurture group has grown. Jos, my co-leader, and I have longed for the Lord to do a deep work in each of us, and so we began asking God to raise up women to lead alongside us. A ratio of two leaders to twenty group members isn’t ideal. When Jos sadly passed away six months ago, I knew I couldn’t continue leading alone. Our nurture group is filled with wise and godly women with wonderful servant hearts. Any one of them could be a leader. But as I asked them to consider helping me lead, they each responded with a version of “Oh, I couldn’t do that”. I knew this couldn’t be due to laziness or spiritual apathy, given their generous and servant-hearted natures. I wanted to understand why these women felt inhibited from serving in a leadership role. Through many conversations over coffee, I started to understand what would help these women flourish. These insights I share with you now. A SAFE ENVIRONMENT A local church should be an environment where everyone can thrive and serve without the fear of getting it wrong. This is critical. Is there a spirit of generosity and encouragement, or one of correction and fault finding? How do we respond when someone gives the wrong answer in a bible study? One negative experience here led one woman to withdraw. For many years, she stopped contributing, her confidence shattered by one moment in time. So a couple of questions. How does your church handle imperfection? Do your leaders exhibit an openness about their own struggles and weaknesses? Or do they present a ‘front’ which gives the impression that weakness is not tolerated? THOUGHTFUL LANGUAGE Language matters. With a background in cross-cultural mission, I should know, but somehow, to my shame, I had forgotten. Words matter. The words we speak and the words that others hear. Consider the word ‘leader’ and ‘lead’. I thought I was asking for someone to facilitate a group discussion on a bible passage. They heard ‘must be articulate, intelligent, educated and know an awful lot of information!’ I didn’t say that but that’s what they heard. And so they were intimidated. On top of this, some have had a negative experience of leadership, which made things worse. So, I asked the women to ‘share’ their thoughts on a passage rather than ‘lead’ a study. Slowly something beautiful began to happen. One woman gave us a theologically rich overview of Romans 5. She wouldn’t say that’s what she had done, but it was. Another expressed herself artistically though creating a piece of art around the passage. As they saw others willing to share, they found they could have a go too. Our time became so much richer. In this way the Dream Team was born. Removing the word ‘leader’ took away much of their anxiety. A few women took the plunge and said ‘yes’. Not everyone on the team leads by leading bible studies. They each have different gifts, but most importantly they are godly, wise, loving women who are willing to step out in faith to serve Christ, trusting that he will supply all their needs. LOTS OF TIME People take time to recover from a season of change or settle into a new church environment. For some, it takes a long time. The newest member of the Dream Team has been around church for around five years. She’s quietly faithful, thoughtful, and extraordinarily gifted. She has been coming along, listening, watching, figuring us out, asking herself, ‘Is this a place where I am safe to try?’ It’s taken time. But this year she is flourishing. We’ve discovered she is a talented musician and finally feels safe enough to join the music group. She’s now teaching the kids, reaching out to newcomers, bringing friends into church. She has stepped into leading the discipleship group for young Christians, a role she loves. She has enthusiastically agreed to join our team. When new people arrive at our churches, clearly godly and gifted, it’s tempting in our enthusiasm to plug them into the gaps. But often, people need time. Perhaps time is needed to heal from a previous damaging church experience. Or it might be time to rest from a busy season of serving. Or time to acclimatize themselves to our way of doing things. Time to figure us out. Time to feel safe. Of course, as leaders, we see the gaps. And they can become burdens to us. Who will serve coffee, lead a children’s group, help at the newcomers’ course? But we need patience. A lot more patience. For there is a deep wisdom in knowing when to ask people to serve, and when to hold back, giving them space to sit and receive. As I wait for the doorbell to ring, I thank God for each one and for Jos who prayed big prayers with me all those months ago. She passed away before she could see her prayers answered in beautiful ways. She had a vision, and the Lord has done wonderful things because of her willingness to pray. We are grateful for her life. Putting some finishing touches to the table settings, I pray that each woman coming for lunch would find real joy in serving together, in finding strength through weakness. I pray that as we plan, share, and encourage one another over lunch, God would deepen our connection with each other and with him. Most importantly, I pray that we would experience the truth of the apostle Paul’s words. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 2 Cor 12.9

I have to say, I wasn’t expecting it. It just seemed to creep up on me. Perhaps it’s my age—I’m not sure—but my fascination with history is starting to leak out.* And before you suggest that I’m rather odd—or I lack self-control—I must say I know a lot of guys around my age who are starting to betray a secret obsession with history. We all listen to The Rest is History podcast presented by Tom Holland and Dominic Sandbrook, and it shows. For me, it shows when an historical illustration finds its way into my sermons. Fewer references to people like David Beckham, and a lot more anecdotes about Wellington and Alfred the Great! I’m learning to attribute my sources promptly, or I’ll be caught out. A few months back, there was a whole episode devoted to great dogs in history. So it was that I learned that Admiral Collingwood’s dog was named Bounce. Collingwood was a naval commander during the Napoleonic wars, fighting alongside Nelson at Trafalgar. When on dry land, he liked nothing better than to stride the Northumbrian hills with Bounce at his side. He also stuffed his pockets full of acorns, and every so often he would plant one of them. Why did he do this? Because he was a man of vision. He knew how much the British Navy relied on mighty oaks for its fleet. He wanted there to be oaks growing for decades, centuries even. He knew that these trees would keep the Navy well supplied and strong. And though he didn’t predict the advent of iron and steel that would radically alter how ships were built (how could he?), the point remains. He recognised that a navy would be needed long after he was gone, and he wanted to do what he could, literally sowing seeds for the future. Well, the church needs mighty oaks for the future too. The Lord uses this precise image to describe his people. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord, for the display of his splendour. Isa 61.3 Amazingly, he wants us to join in with his forestry project. Because here’s the truth—one day, we’ll be gone. And most of us won't have books written about us. Nor will we be a featured historical figure on The Rest is History. Tom Holland and Dominic Sandbrook won’t be waxing lyrical about our achievements. But that doesn’t matter. Not one bit. Because our significance lies in the fact that we’re planting acorns. That’s what matters. That takes real vision. It requires that we look past our own petty egos and ambitions and invest in God’s kingdom for the ages; indeed, for eternity. Such vision calls us to see our lives as just one leg of a relay race down through the millennia. We’re not called to be better, more noticeable, or more glorious than the other runners. We’re called to carry the baton safely and pass it on. We see this baton-passing mentioned often in the Bible. Here are some verses on this subject worth reading. Proverbs 13.20; 27.17 Romans 15.14. 1 Corinthians 4.15; 11.1. Philippians 4.9 2 Timothy 2.2; 3:14. Hebrews 10.24-25; 13.7 Surely this is also a crucial element in Jesus’ great commission. Go and make disciples . . . teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you . . . Matt 28.19a;20a How do we do this? Certainly, we can do it through formal mentoring or discipling relationships, but actually these acorns are planted in all kinds of ways. It doesn’t require us to have younger believers sat at our feet, hanging on our every word as we recount our wisdom and experience. If that’s our method, we’ll probably be disappointed to find that not many want to sit and listen to our old war stories. Most often, and perhaps more effectively, it’s about drawing alongside people, listening intently, showing interest, and speaking words of encouragement. When we do this, our relationships blossom into ones in which we can ask gentle, open questions that spur growth. These budding acorns we then water with our prayers. Though it’s not fully realised yet, I have a vision of a church community in which the twenty-somethings walk alongside teenagers; the middle-aged walk alongside the younger adults; the mature and seasoned saints draw close to the bemused mid-lifers, just letting them know that they’ve walked similar paths and learned from their mistakes. And are still learning. God’s kingdom needs mighty oaks for the future. For those of us who more readily identify with the dandelion, it is wonderful to know that even our weaknesses—especially our weaknesses—can be used by the Lord to build up and encourage mighty oaks for the coming generations. Many reading this will already be planting acorns in all kinds of ways. But you may also be discouraged. Sometimes we don’t see the impact we’re having. Sometimes we wonder if our acorns are growing at all. If this is you, I have a word of encouragement. Please remember, acorns take time to grow. A long time. Welsh poet R.S. Thomas once wrote a poem entitled ‘The Country Clergy’. He was himself a clergyman, and he wrote of little-recognised ministers, working in obscure country parishes who . . . “…left no books, Memorial to their lonely thought In grey parishes; rather they wrote On men’s hearts and in the minds Of young children sublime words Too soon forgotten. God in his time Or out of time will correct this.” ** It’s a great vision, to be writing on people’s hearts, planting acorns for the future. For they are becoming mighty oaks, displaying not my renown but God’s splendour. That’s what I want to be doing. I’m sure you do too. *Why do men of a certain age display a fascination with history? Now there’s a possible blog post for someone else. Watch this space! ** R.S. Thomas, in Collected Poems, 1945–1990 (London: Dent, 1993), p.82

Here at Living Leadership, we offer pastoral support to leaders and their spouses. That’s one of our raisons d'être. We offer many services here, but all our activities are focused on caring for and equipping those who lead (in churches and Christian organisations) and their spouses. PASTORAL SUPPORT When God calls us to fulfil a short-term need for support, we have no idea where it might take us in the longer term. I have experienced a few times relationships developing from mentoring - maybe focused on a single issue - into friendship. One pastor came to me in crisis ten years ago. Ten years has been enough time for the relationship to develop and grow. We’ve shared many of our life’s challenges with each other, and though it began in crisis, we have moved on. We now have a deep bond of friendship that we both cherish. And we’re still doing what matters most: studying the bible and praying together. Before the pandemic, I was meeting with a brother who had recently left parish ministry to pursue a chaplaincy role. God had placed a burden on him to establish a charity offering chaplains to a particular demographic. As his vision sharpened, God began to provide people, resources, and opportunities. It was an exciting time, and I found that my own role began to change. I still offered soul care to my friend, but he invited me to take part in supporting the work of the charity. I was elected as Interim Chair to take the organisation through to its first AGM. It was a real honour to attend and chair a meeting which not only appointed new trustees but also a much more appropriate and skilled chairman! The past four years have seen a whirlwind of activity, but our primary focus has never wavered. As we’ve always done, we meet to offer mutual encouragement based on bible study and prayer. GROWTH IN THE GARDEN In a previous post, I wrote about my gardening exploits. I particularly enjoy watching tiny seeds or bulbs growing into fully mature plants. When you look at the packet, you can see a photo of what the plant is supposed to look like once it’s full-grown. Occasionally, however, a rogue seed finds its way into the soil, and as you watch your begonias grow, you’re not quite sure what’s happening. What is that nasty coiling greenery wrapped around my budding flowers?! Sometimes you’re fooled into thinking you’ve gained a new, interesting plant, but perhaps that’s the Scotsman in me—excited about acquiring something for free! There is a similarity here with a mentoring or pastoral relationship. We come alongside a person, who is seeking care, guidance, or perhaps just some spiritual food. Often there is a ‘presenting issue’, a spiritual need. At times, there may be weeds. We begin in one place but it soon emerges that we’re dealing with the persistent weed of some sinful behaviour, attitude, or habit. When this occurs, we provide support by walking alongside people. Through mutual study, prayer, and conversation, a relationship develops. Trust builds. And as it does, a bond is forged which can stand the moment when we must sometimes gently challenge what may be a deep-rooted issue. The relationship, if it is to develop well, needs not only a foundation of trust built up over time, but an end goal. It must be focused on helping the tender shoot to stand up on its own. When we begin to see this happening, it is a wonder to behold, because it is dependent on the work of God. In nature, sunlight causes photosynthesis to occur—a process that triggers growth in a plant. The hormones of the plant and its DNA, along with the nutrients of the soil and water molecules combine to give us ears of grain, flowers, seeds and leaves. Just as we can’t see atoms with our eyes, we don’t really see all that goes on in the chemistry of plant growth—but it happens because God designed plants this way. It’s an inevitable process when the combination is right, and Jesus even talks about it in the parable of the growing seed. Night and day, whether he* sleeps or gets up, the seed sprouts and grows, though he does not know how. All by itself the soil produces grain—first the stalk, then the head, then the full kernel in the head. As soon as the grain is ripe, he puts the sickle to it, because the harvest has come. Mark 4.27-29 *The farmer. Just as the Kingdom of God commences inconspicuously and then grows slowly until it’s ready for harvest, so it is with spiritual growth in individuals. To help people grow and enjoy the benefits of the mentor/mentee relationship, we use careful and persistent questions to plant the seed of God’s word, and we entrust them to the presence of God, the Holy Spirit. Mentors cannot force growth—that is not in our power. However, we can provide an environment in which our conversations become spiritual food that generates growth. Our words, by the grace of God, feed the soul. And it’s only by his grace that they do. We are merely servants, guided by the Spirit. Have you ever kept watch as grass seeds gradually turn into a smooth green lawn? Or have you watched a new plant sprout new growth? It’s so exciting. The green fuzz that slowly appears, or the buds that begin to erupt into colour—they are such splendid works of our Creator. So it is when we see others grow in the knowledge and grace of God. When it happens, we should give thanks, of course. But we should also pass on to our mentees what we’re seeing. Encouragement nurtures and feeds the soul. At Living Leadership, we are privileged to be able to walk with leaders and their spouses, to support and encourage them. Each person is like a ‘tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season (Ps 1.3a). Every person I’ve mentored fills me with joy for I have watched them become ‘oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendour’ (Isa 61.3c). Editor’s Note: If you are involved in Christian ministry, and are interested in receiving pastoral support, do visit our Refresh Ministries page to find out about all the ways we can support you.

A couple of months ago, I began a series of posts based on the movie, McFarland, USA*. Here is the third post in this series. (Read my first post, including synopsis. My second post.) The movie, McFarland, USA, contains many themes. It’s especially strong on leadership, but at its heart, it’s a movie about sports. It’s about team, and how a team is built. Church leaders have no trouble talking about teams, but sport? Well, there’s a conundrum. If I mention football again, half the congregation will sigh and switch off. But if I don’t mention our city’s triumph yesterday, I will be out of touch. Which half should I offend? At this point, it’s worth a reminder of why sport is so important, whether you like it or not. Sport is important in our culture, because in many ways, it has replaced religion. It therefore sets out to satisfy many of the longings of the human heart previously associated with religion. As a character in a book I wrote recently said, “Sports . . . Aidan. The gathering of the faithful . . . arms aloft . . . communal singing . . . salvation figures . . . the outpouring of devotion. Modern-day worship.” House of Souls, p.219 Cross-country running doesn’t immediately make most people think of teams. But it should. At least, it should when you understand that, as a high school sport in the USA, each runner competes for points that add up to a team score. You run on your own, but you run for your team. Sounds a lot like church. In fact, it sounds a lot like this verse from the letter to the Hebrews. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. Heb 12.1b-2a In McFarland, USA, the individual effort to reach the winning post is submitted to the team goal. No one runs to win alone. They all run for each other. So when they win, they win together. Team first, individual glory second. What, then, can we learn from Jim White’s example as the man who builds this team? BELONGING What did Jim White do to unlock the potential in these young men? Essentially, he called them into relationship. He saw them. He valued them. And he made sacrifices to spend time with them. That’s a lot like Jesus. Jim White also understood the power that comes from belonging. At the beginning of the film, they resist almost all the demands he makes. They argue and occasionally storm off. But they keep coming back. They could quit, but they don’t. That’s because Jim White has unlocked a basic human need. To belong. And he does this by giving them a shared goal that undergirds belonging. That goal starts to give them value and purpose in a way they have never experienced before. As a leader, this is all about relationship. Why do people attend your church? The music? The preaching? The theology? May I submit that the principal reason your church members attend your particular church is community? It’s the people. It’s always about the people. It’s ALWAYS about relationship. Because through relationship, we belong. Ask, therefore . . . Am I effectively identifying isolated people in my community, and helping them belong? Am I engaging in activities that enhance good relationships in church, or am I myself rather isolated from the group? Do I properly understand the relationships between my church members? Do I help those relationships deepen and stimulate spiritual growth? When relationship sour, do I set out to reconcile people? Do I make the necessary sacrifices to tackle conflict when it arises? Is my church a place where everyone feels they belong? If not, why not? OVERCOME OBJECTIONS Building a team is hard, because leadership is hard. It requires perseverance, strength of purpose, and a sure conviction that the culture you’re aiming for is one that gives glory to God. That means you’ll face opposition. It’s part of the job. Jim White faces constant cynicism and complaining from his team. Especially from his team leader. The one he had hoped would inspire the others, Thomas Valles, is the one who moans the most, and then quits the team. (Later, he returns.) He’s the one who needs to be saved (see a later post on this). It reminds me of Simon Peter, who quit, and needed to be restored. Thomas is surly and negative, but in many ways, he undergoes the greatest transformation. Rather like Simon Peter. So, every time you face opposition, remember who you are, where you’re heading, and who is on your side. Opposition is a sign that you’re dealing with people who don’t want change. Nor did Jim White’s running team. But they still followed their leader. So as long as the whining, complaining church members are still there, there is still hope for the future. Be gracious towards those who don’t like change but remember that if the Lord is calling you to build a team, and change is essential, then he will be with you as you implement those changes. FIND THEIR JOY In a later post, I will write about gifts, based on 1 Corinthians 12. Suffice to say here that we build a team most effectively when we help our people find their joy. So let’s widen this a little. What makes Mrs. Jones feel that she belongs? Remembering her son who’s serving in the army? See Jerry over there? He’s just been made redundant. What could you do to involve him more at church? Does he need a mentor or counsellor? Are the musical ones using their musical gifts? Are the evangelists equipped to evangelise? Are the carers equipped to care for the needy? As you look around at your congregation, do you see a group of people who have found their joy? Because when a person finds their joy, they so often feel that they belong. That’s why it’s so important for people to discover their role, their place, in a community. Millions upon millions of people attend football matches, seeking a place to belong. Yet in church, we have a ready-made loving community where anyone can serve and discover how much they are loved. So help people find their joy by finding their place. PUSH THEM Winning takes sacrifice. Real effort. Sadly, we sometimes get our theology in a tangle. You don’t have to do anything, we say, to receive the grace of God. All you need is faith. Spot on. Absolutely right. But oh, the unfortunate consequences of this truth when mis-applied. The free grace of God does not mean that the Christian life is absent of the need to discipline oneself. To quote the apostle Paul, Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. 1 Cor 9.24-25 Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. Effort. Discipline. Jim White makes his team do yet another lap, jog up yet another hill. He demands discipline, and by doing so, he finds a team that responds. Find a way, therefore, to overcome your politeness, if that’s an issue for you. Challenge your people to grow. Don’t just shake their hands as they leave. Consider how you can encourage each person to grow. If that entails a little ‘pushing’, then take that risk. If that means overcoming your fear, then so be it. I think you’ll be surprised by the response you get. A leader who truly desires that I grow? And calls me out, encouraging me (and sometimes challenging me) in my faith? That’s a leader I’ll follow. YOU’RE THE FAN Who matters most in the stadium? The fans. Without fans, there is no sport. Without fans, what’s the point? So if you want to build a team, start to think like a fan. Fans love their teams. I mean, really love their teams. They come out in all weathers, drive hundreds of miles, to support their team. You must show the same dedication. Because people crave encouragement, even if they don’t vocalise it. Listen to Jim White, encouraging his team before the state championship race. It’s enough to bring a tear to the eye. Every team here deserves to be. Including you. But they haven’t got what you’ve got. They don’t get up at dawn and go to work in the fields. They don’t go to school all day and go back to work in those same fields. They can’t even imagine it. And then you come out and you run 8 miles, 10 miles and you take on even more pain. These kids don’t do what you do. They can’t even imagine it . . . You guys are super-human. What you endure just to be here, to get a shot at this, the kind of privilege someone like me takes for granted, there’s nothing you can’t do with that kind of strength, that kind of heart. You kids have the biggest hearts I’ve ever seen. It’s little surprise that these kids ran with hearts like lions after listening to that. Self-belief surged through their bodies, because their leader supported and loved them. He believed in them. So he encouraged them by speaking truth into their hearts. That’s leadership.

No pain, no gain. I’m sure you know the slogan. Its roots may go back a long time, but it was popularised in the 1980s in a series of exercise videos by Jane Fonda. According to Wikipedia, ‘Medical experts agree that the proverb is wrong for exercise’. I’m not so sure. After exercise, a certain kind of pain indicates that you’ve worked the muscles in a way that generates size and efficiency. Other kinds of pain reveal that you’ve overdone it, and possibly damaged your muscles. Exercise experts know the difference . . . and I don’t. Exercise wisdom is not my forte! What happens when we apply this principle to ministry? Serving others often entails pain. Self-denial and the opposition of the evil one often lead to suffering. Sadly, too, there is the pain of betrayal, rejection, and unfair accusations from those we seek to lead. This is all part and parcel of what the apostle Paul describes as ‘sharing in the sufferings of Christ’ (Rom 8.17; 2 Cor 1.5; Phil 3.10). Is ministry gain impossible without pain? I wouldn’t go that far. However, it does seem that the apostle Paul expects pain as part of the package. 2 Corinthians tackles this subject directly. And it’s certainly true that pain can be a source of gain. Like me, I’m sure you can testify to how the Lord has grown your character and faith through painful experiences. And if you’re currently going through one, I am confident that God is able to produce growth in you through it, (though that might be hard to hear right now). When we think of the Lord Jesus, the phrase, ‘no pain, no gain’ is certainly true. But with a twist. His pain was for our gain. There could be no glory for us without his wounds. The apostle Paul seems to have that in mind when speaking of ministry. He is less concerned about the minister’s growth, and much more focused on how our suffering blesses others. Hence, the title of this post: No pain (for me), no gain (for you). He stresses this in one of his letters. If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. 2 Cor 1.6 Earlier in the passage, Paul describes God as ‘the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort’. What beautiful words to describe God—a loving Father whose heart of compassion is towards his children, and a sovereign God who works in his power for the comfort of his people. The word comfort—paraklésis—doesn’t just mean a pat on the back. It’s rich with overtones of encouragement and undertones of exhortation. It describes the act of giving strength to others and spurring them on. It also contains the idea that we come alongside others, put our arms around their shoulders, and help them bear their weight as they limp onwards. That’s what our Father does for us. By the indwelling Spirit, who is the Parakletos, he carries us along as we endure distress. But the comfort of our Father can also come to us through others. For example, Titus brought comfort to Paul (2 Cor 7.6). If you need support from someone, reach out to Living Leadership, and we’ll seek to offer that. Your Father knows and he cares. He is always with you by his Spirit and also available through your brothers and sisters in Christ. Growth through suffering—and God’s comfort—is one thing, but Paul is onto something a little different. He says his suffering is for the Corinthians. His pain is their gain. How, exactly, did Paul expect the comfort he had received from God to comfort the Corinthians? I think there are two aspects. GROWTH AS A MINISTER First, Paul believed that his own suffering—and God’s consequent comfort—made him a better minister. It helped him become more effective in caring for others. He doesn’t endorse his suffering as a blessing, nor does he argue that all suffering leads to our good. He’s being more precise. He’s claiming that the kind of suffering he’s experienced has specifically prepared him to care for others going through similar pain. Those who rely upon the promises of God in dire straits are able to proclaim them more powerfully to others. Those who have felt the uplifting arms of God can more fully embrace those who are fainting. APPROPRIATE SELF-DISCLOSURE Paul didn’t hide his suffering. How could he? They had witnessed some for themselves. But he goes out of his way to remind the Corinthians of what they already knew. Indeed, he adds new details in one of his letters. We do not want you to be uninformed, brothers and sisters, about the troubles we experienced in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired of life itself. 2 Cor 1.8 In short, Paul is modelling appropriate self-disclosure. Importantly I’m talking here about self-discloure about our weaknesses in our ministry with those we lead. That is a different matter than confessing our sins to others to seek help to live faithfully. Ministers must seek accountability and those who have committed serious leadership abuses must confess and submit themselves to the proper authorities. My focus in this post is not on those matters but on the kind of self-disclosure Paul models in 2 Corinthians - sharing with those we lead something of our internal struggles for their benefit. How can ministers know what to share about themselves in their preaching and pastoral cnversations? I have seen how disastrous it can be when ministers over-share their struggles or do it in a way that seems to be only for their own benefit rather than also for the benefit of those they lead. It can be a distraction from the gospel or even a way of manipulating people. (‘I can’t raise any concerns with my minister, because he has his own struggles’.) Another danger is sharing about past traumas when we are not ready or able to do so without reopening our own wounds. Certainly, some people have effective ministries that arise from being able to help others through traumas similar to their own experiences (e.g., abuse, miscarriage, depression etc.). But this is a choice, which should be guided by wisdom and good counsel, not an obligation. Having said this, however, it’s my observation that many ministers err on the side of under-disclosing. They never share about their own struggles in sermons and rarely do so in pastoral conversations. Even then, they speak generally and not specifically. We can learn from the apostle Paul here. Pastoral ministry is relational and in relationships we share ourselves with others. By sharing appropriately from real life experience, we help people see not only what they should do but how they can do it. We paint a realistic picture of the life of faith. Here are some principles to help us follow Paul’s example. Don’t share when you’re in the thick of the struggle. Do so after the event, when you have had time to reflect on what God has taught you. Only share about past traumas after you’ve undergone sufficient healing and if you believe, by God’s grace, that you can do so without retraumatising yourself. If you choose to share, then it’s advisable to have a close friend/mentor to lean on, someone with whom you can pray both before and after sharing. Be honest and open about how an experience has impacted you. Don’t downplay how tough it was. Be discrete about details of sins or struggles that won’t edify others. As an example, Paul speaks of a ‘thorn in the flesh,’ clearly something very personal but which remains unnamed.* Testify to God as the one who sustained you. Direct people’s gaze to Christ and how you appreciated him as Saviour, Lord and sustainer. If possible, share the specific truth about God (or his promise) that kept you going. His promise to raise the dead (2 Cor 1.9) and the sufficiency of his grace (2 Cor 12.9) are two examples. Help people to frame their struggles with an eye to their eternal future. Paul often refers to his hope of the resurrection. If we follow these principles, our self-disclosure can be a blessing to others. It is a valuable tool. Ministry can be very challenging. At times it is painful, but we know our struggles are not in vain. Indeed, God has designed it so that our pain can be used for the gain of others. To encourage and draw them closer to the one who loves and sustains them. For his glory.