Look at me!

Don’t look at them, look at me!

Over twenty years ago, I heard these words in a sermon, and they remain with me to this day. They have left an indelible mark inside me. In fact, my response to them—either in heeding them or ignoring them—has defined my whole life.

Let me set the scene.

I was living in Southern California with my wife and children, and we attended a Presbyterian church. The preacher, called Chuck (Charles), was the youth leader; he attended our homegroup. He is black, and was in his thirties at the time. I was not a close friend of his, which is an important detail. The impact of his words did not come from a shared bond of friendship. It came from the power of the words, their truth and relevance to my life, and the Holy Spirit. Though it might sound odd, he wasn’t the significant one. His words were. This is what happens when God chooses to speak. The one mediating the message is important, but not as important as the God who is speaking.

THE STORY

Chuck told a story about an incident in a car park. He was with his white girlfriend, and a gang of youths started taunting him. A black man with a white girlfriend was quite capable of stoking racist attitudes in the U.S.A. back then, and sadly remains so. He was becoming agitated and was about to shout back at his tormentors, when his girlfriend took hold of his face and turned it gently towards her.

‘No, Chuck, don’t look at them, look at me!’

In other words, ‘Look at the face of the one who loves you. Stop wasting energy on people who mean you harm. There is nothing to be gained by doing that. When you look at me, my love will be all you need. So, look at me!’

And that’s what he did. He gazed into the eyes of his girlfriend. His girlfriend became his wife, and they have lived together happily as man and wife to this day.

So, what did I learn from this story?

DISTRACTIONS

Like many Christians today, there are times when I have been ‘Laodicean’ in my approach to my faith. Luke-warm. Neither hot nor cold. At times, I have deserved to be spat out. The principal reason for this can be summed up with one word: distractions. I have been distracted by the cares of this world.

The seed falling among the thorns refers to someone who hears the word, but the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth choke the word, making it unfruitful.

Matt 13.22

It is not uncommon in our churches to find swathes of people seduced by what I call the ‘There’s nothing wrong with . . .’ affliction. (A post on this coming later). Enjoyable pastimes that aren’t classified as sins (watching TV, children’s sports, repairing our homes etc), that are all well and good, except that they gradually swell to engulf not just some of our time, but almost all our time. The flame flickers and gradually dies, though we pretend that Sunday church attendance still keeps it alive.

Don’t look at them, look at me!

Before writing about the descent towards ‘Nothing’ (the complete frittering away of our time), C.S. Lewis includes this line in his Screwtape masterpiece.

He will want his prayers to be unreal, for he will dread nothing so much as effective contact with the Enemy (i.e. God). His aim will be to let sleeping worms lie.

The Screwtape Letters: Letters from a Senior to a Junior Devil (i)

Our hearts become cold when the contemplation of the Lord becomes something we fear. We avoid ‘effective contact with the Enemy (God)’. Distractions then function as suitable methods by which we avoid intimacy with him, because . . . well . . . why? There’s a question. Perhaps, in part, because we haven’t properly understood grace. Or maybe because prayer and worship require concentration and effort, and we have never trained ourselves to focus for longer than a few minutes at best.

THE BEATIFIC VISION

In The Divine Comedy, Dante imagines the soul’s journey towards God. Regardless of your view of Dante’s theology, he has the right destination in mind. He does understand that the ultimate goal of all believers is to experience the ‘beatific vision’. I particularly like these lines in the final Canto.

I remember I grew bolder for this reason

In bearing up with it, until I merged

My gazing with the infinite Goodness.

O grace abounding, by which I have dared

To fix my eyes through the eternal Light

So deeply that my sight was spent in it!

Divine Comedy. Paradiso. Canto XXXIII. Lines 79-84.

The ‘beatific vision’ of Dante’s conception is considered to take place after death, but the apostle Paul believes that our contemplation of the Lord is something that changes us here and now. Two verses come to mind.

And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.

2 Cor 3.18

Paul acknowledges our current limitations, even as he longs for perfect vision.

For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

2 Cor 13.12

The contemplation of the Lord’s glory. The Westminster Confession puts it this way: ‘To glorify God, and enjoy him forever’. This is our destiny.

I think this is why Chuck’s sermon has left such a mark in me. For me, his story encapsulated exactly what God is saying to me every day of my life.

Trust me. Love me. If you gaze upon me, you will see that I can be trusted to give you all you need right now. Don’t allow anything out there to take your focus away from me, because when you look at me, you will see that I love you. And that’s all you need. So look at me, and know that I love you.

TRUST

Implicit in these words is a link between faith and love. While Chuck was becoming distracted by his tormentors, his girlfriend was inviting him to trust that she knew what was best for him. When he turned to gaze into her eyes, it was an act of faith. Faith and love are inextricably linked. To love God is to trust him. And when we trust him, we will turn to him in worship.

Every morning, we all awake in that car park. Every morning. The world is screaming for our attention. It is dragging us down or it is telling us lies. It may also be filling us with so many enjoyable pursuits that we no longer desire to gaze in the face of the one who loves us. We have become distracted or we don’t really believe the words of the one who made us. Yet, our beloved stands before us, pulling our face towards his. He asks us to trust him. He wants our attention; he wants us to catch a vision of his glory.

MOSES’ SHINING FACE

It is said that Moses, on coming down from Mount Sinai, had a face that shone (Ex 34.29-35). His contact with the Lord had left a physical mark on him. That mark was light. So he put on a veil to cover his face. It was too much (too bright?) for others to bear. I’d be surprised if the apostle Paul didn’t have the Exodus account in mind when he wrote to the Corinthians. And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory. We, like Moses, are invited to contemplate the Lord’s glory. What an astonishing thought. No mountain. No tablets of stone. No veils.

Just a vision of the believer who worships, who gazes upon the Lord’s glory.

So, a few questions to finish. Do you trust the Lord? With all your heart and soul? Or have you become distracted? Are you listening to him when he pulls your face towards his?

Don’t look at them, look at me!

The Lord says this to me every day. Does he say it to you?

Look at me. Enjoy me. Worship me. Love me. When you look at me, you will see that I love you. And that’s all you need right now.

So look at me, and know that I love you.

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(i) Letter 9. The Screwtape Letters: Letters from a Senior to a Junior Devil. C.S.Lewis. 1942. Bodley Head.